WWWDWFB?

Yes, I am resorting to long-winded acronyms for the title of my blog. But I will pay you if you can figure out what it stands for. Well, that's actually a lie. But I am willing to dole out more than my share of cool points, replacing the awesomeness of any monetary gain. Pinky promise.


So tonight, my fine Interweb specimen, hear this. I am about to write a blog connecting the worlds of internet networking and meditation. No need to reread, my lovelies, you read right the first time. Tonight, meditation and Facebook are joined in coupledom. At least on the Swiss Cheese Channel.


Friday evening, I found myself wandering the myriad rows of books at Barnes & Noble. Again. I swear those people get sick of seeing me. If not now, very, very soon. Anyhow, I love reading the titles, seeing the colors on the spines of the books. I even like to feel a cover or two of a nicely textured binding. I know, I know. Don't judge me. Keeping  focus now..I stop in the Self-Improvement section, perusing titles, half-paying attention. Then I read the spine of this one. Nothing about it was dazzling; the typeface was vanilla. Nothing about the colors were exciting. But for whatever reason I read the title, and that's what made me slide the book out of its designated resting spot. It was called "Wherever You Go There You Are". Interesting concept if you think about it, no? So I opened the cover and read a few lines of the jacket. The more I read, the more I liked. "You, my little paperbacked friend, are coming home with me" I thought. And so it did.


(Don't fret, I will extinguish any hunger for the book's contents momentarily.)


During my Facebook travels this evening, I stumbled across a friend's status that read:

"there is a dull pain in my heart tonight....and its ok that its there. I'm just being with it."

My new paperbacked friend and I aren't very well acquainted yet, but the chapter I did read was on this topic exactly. My proverbial jaw dropped. After I cleaned up the "slobber" that was created by said jaw drop, I thought about the connection between what I read and my friend's status. In the intro of the book, the author (I feel very relaxed reading his writing, so I'm going to call him Jon) talks about themes of the book, the most prevalent being "mindfulness".


I'm a word nerd, so I took an immediate liking to this one. It just sounds peaceful. Being a major ideal in Buddhism, it would make sense to carry such a connotation. Jon says this about "mindfulness":

"Mindfulness is an ancient Buddhist practice which has profound relevance for our present-day lives. This relevance has nothing to do with Buddhism per se or with becoming a Buddhist, but it has everything to do with waking up and living in harmony with oneself and with the world. It has to do with examining who we are, with questioning our view of the world and our place in it, and with cultivating some appreciation for the fullness of each moment we are alive." 

I had to commend my friend for her recognition and appreciation of the pain she was referring to. Just "being" with that sort of feeling isn't easy. Pain obviously isn't a pleasant thing to chill with; oftentimes we wish time would speed up so we can be healed of whatever is ailing us. Sit with it. Welcome it. Understand it. In doing this, we sit with ourselves. We understand ourselves that much more intimately. Additionally, built into everyone's brain is something called the limbic system. This is the area specifically responsible for emotion. Consider that for a second. A whole blasted section of our brain is dedicated to the decoding and recognition of emotion. Don't waste it. Cultivate it.

I feel challenged. Having read and reflected on all that was just discussed, I have to share the depth of my experience. It truly was eye-opening, friends. Sipping on my chai latte*, sitting cross-legged on my floor in my comfy sweats, listening to nothing by my fingers move across the keyboard and the soft hum of the computer fan, I become aware of my thoughts, my feelings. I'm at peace. I'm powerful. I have the capacity to understand hurt, anger, elation, and everything else in between. Not only do I have the ability to understand these things, but now I know to stop and appreciate them too. Savor them. Carpe diem, bitches.


End hippy-dippy-cheese-wizz. 


Did you figure out the acronym in the title? I'll tell ya. What Would We Do Without Facebook? That's what it stands for. 

As always, thanks for reading. JenP, out. 


*A little bit of refreshing and random knowledge here..my friend Anna is Latvian (a Russian-speaking country), and she taught me this evening that saying "chai tea" is redundant, because in Russian, "chai" means..what's this? Tea. HA! So I will no longer be ordering a "chai tea latte" because who drinks a tea tea latte? Not this chick. I drink chaiiiiiii lattes. Indeed.

I just finished "Eat, Pray, Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert. To be truthful, my awareness of the book's existence was, well, non-exisitent before I saw the movie. But I love me some Julia Roberts, so I decided to make an evening of it. I texted my best friend, Becky and her sis, Meghan, and off we went. 

Julia Roberts, as always, was luminescent. The scenery was fantastic (duh). The acting was so-so, as you can expect from a book-turned-movie. All in all, I thought the movie was good. Good enough, in fact, I had to buy the book. Not to shock you all into heart failure, but I liked it even more than the movie. The movie stayed really true to the book, which was refreshing. Obviously one down-fall of making a movie from the plot of a book, especially out of a memoir, is that you loose complexity from a lot of different areas of said plot. 

*insert segway to plot summary*

Liz Gilbert is a 30-year-old married woman. She has everything an educated, ambitious American woman is supposed to want - a husband, a house, a successful career. But what's this? She's confused. Anxious. Consumed with panic. She doesn't want to be married anymore. She divorces her husband. Liz experiences a crushing depression, another failed love, and the eradication of everything she thought was supposed to be. 

She makes the radical decision to uproot. She says goodbye to aforementioned lover, stores her personals at her sister's, and takes off for a year of soul-searching. Now, now, before you start your full-on eyeball roll, hear me out. She calculates the amount of time spent in relationships. Without counting the time after breakups and before new flames ignite, she can't remember a time in the last fifteen years that she's spent more than two weeks alone. Woah. And she relays honestly that she falls hard and fast and foolishly for men. She gives of herself too freely, she says. So now, it's time to be by herself. 

First stop is Italy. Here, she will study - and indulge - in the art of pleasure. Living in Rome serves her all of the pleasures she could possibly crave. She is immersed in the sexiest culture (arguably) in the world, but ironically decides to remain abstinent for the duration of her soul-searching mission. Anyway, she learns the language, falls in love with the culture and spends her time transversing this drippingly sexy country, exploring every culinary deliciousity she can get her paws on. Bitch. 

Second stop: India. This is where she studied the art of devotion. With the help of a wise (ass) cowboy from Tejas named Richard and a native guru, Liz embarks on a solid four months of spiritual exploration. 

Last stop is Bali. How beautiful this land is. The people, the food, their tragic history. Bali is four months of learning to live in the balances of worldly pleasures and otherworldly transcendence. She became besties with a sixth-generation medicine man who calls her "Liss", and unexpectedly fell in love with a beautiful Brazillian man. 

*end segway*

Seeing the movie, you only get a snap-shot of everything Liz Gilbert. Her intensely articulate verbage invites you into the depths of her dispair and to the peaks of her joy and peace. It (honest to God/Allah/Zeus) feels like you've spent a couple hours catching up with an old friend. That's how easy her writing is to read. 

Writing a memoir on "finding yourself" is a task not taken lightly. The honesty poured into this book is astounding. This book is about taking "destiny" by the reigns and claiming responsibility for your life's contentedness. Not giving in to society's cookie cutter about what life you should be happy with living. I think the book could be represented by a single quote;

"Stop wearing your wishbone where your backbone ought to be." 

There is absolutely no good in spending your days wishing and hoping for a better tomorrow, with opportunity abound. If something is ailing you, do something. The worst thing you can do for yourself is set idly. It's easy though, not doing anything. It takes no effort, but it does take a toll. 

From this book, I've learned proactivity, if such a word exists. My fantastic boyfriend brought this idea up to me about a year ago when I was thinking about (brooding is more than accurate) how much weight I had put on. All he said was, "Then start working out." Ew! What an insensitive jerk, right? I mean, how dare he not understand my need for a magic weight-loss pill? 

Really, Jen?

Stop wishing for magic to happen, when the tools are in your hands. And what do you know. Working out proves effective in 100% of it's participants. And there are less side effects than those pesky oral medications anyway. :) 

Pre-Slumber Bloggage

Hello dear and fellow Interweb users, I have returned. I, for one, am impressed!

Of course, stuff has happened between the time that I posted last and now, but really nothing noteworthy. So I'll spare you of any boring blah-blah blogging. You're welcome. Wait, wait..nothing noteworthy except for one thing. I am the proud owner of a round-trip plane ticket to Geneva, Switzerland! My Swiss-implant of a boyfriend and I went halfies on the purchase of this fine specimen of happiness, for a grand total of $808.01. I'm going to Europe. To be his date for the Marine Corps Birthday Ball. I'm such a spoiled little brat. Just ask me. :)

Aside from that big bundle of excitement (happy dance!), and short of sounding like Zelda, I do want to say that I have been on something of a quest. In the last year and a half, my life has changed dramatically. Prior to the exclusive relationship I enjoy with my Swiss-implanted, long-distance American boyfriend, I was in a poisonous and horrifying relationship for three years. Suffice it to say that I took away many a bad habit from that relationship. Post-breakup, I found myself to be very self-centered, self-pitying and without much self-confidence. This annoyed me; I don't even want to think about how the people I care about felt. It was time to change.

I wanted to change physically. Emotionally. Spiritually. Feeling overwhelmed with all these necessary upgrades, I listened to Implant's advice. "If you don't like something, then change it", was his mantra. Psh. Too simple. I was searching for that one-liner that would all but floor me like a 350-pound linebacker. Beauty is simplicity, no? YES. Yes, Jen, it is! I finally HEARD what Implant was mantra-ing! If you can change it, then DO it! Don't make excuses. Just GO. One foot in front of the other style. So I did. I welcomed the loss of 30 pounds. I started saving money. I have started healing from the pain my relationship caused.

This week, I forgave myself for letting myself go for an entire three years.


That one was huge. Now, let's get this straight, loyal readers of mine. I'm not claiming Enlightenment status or anything, but what I am saying is that was point one, in favor of my quest for healing. For change. For self-recognition.

I wish I could share my "7 Steps to Free and Easy" guide with you, but really, that guide is nonexistent. Recognizing that self-loathing and brooding and regret is counterproductive. Great, Jen, you lost 30 pounds. You, for once in your whole life, have more than the obligatory $25 in your savings account. But I was still unhappy. I was always wanting more. Why was it so hard for me to stop and recognize how much progress I HAD made? I wanted perfection immediately. Time to sloooww down, sistah, and see the good that you have created for your life. My sweet little Implant, all the way from Switzerland, called me out on it. He told me to wake up everyday and realize that I'm awesome, otherwise, misery is mine for the claiming. No thanks, someone else can have it, no charge.

He was right. Again. I have done a lot to shake my past off my shoulders. And I needed to stop and see that. There was so much that I wanted to do to rid myself of those hurtful three years, and I wanted it done yesterday. Time healed most, but grace finished the job. All I needed was a little patience and love for myself. And I discovered the need and desire for these things through a fantastic source of truth and wisdom. And he is 6500 miles away. :) Teehee.

I'm happier now than I have ever been, cumulatively. I have a new perspective on happiness that I can relate to and can be summed up in a quote from "Eat, Pray, Love" by the wonderfully talented Elizabeth Gilbert:

"Happiness is the consequence of personal effort. You fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it. You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestations of your own blessings. And once you have achieved a state of happiness, you must never become lax about maintaining it. You must make a mighty effort to keep swimming upward into that happiness forever, to stay afloat on top of it." 


There it is. I know that I still have things to work on, goals to work for. But that's nothing to get my cute Victoria's Secret undies in a bunch over. There is always work to be done. And working for those things will bring happiness, just as reaching those goals will bring happiness. So, Jen, have a cup of Sanka and enjoy the sunrise.


For once, in the longest time I can  remember, I feel contentedness. Peace. It's a good place to be. :)

Holy Cheese, Batman!

Meandering the aisles of Barnes & Noble this evening, I found nothing to satiate my standards for the amount of drippy, cheesy, inspirational I was lusting after. I was getting sort of pouty, to be frank, when nothing short of brilliance struck. "Ah-HA", I thought, "why don't you try your hand at writing something drippy and cheesy?" Yes. I think I will.

Please enjoy. And comment. I am doing this purely out of curiosity. And hope that I can commit to a semi-regular posting. I want this to be an exercise for me to be completely and unabashedly open, uncensored and confident about my thoughts and in my writing.

Oh, right. An explanation behind the cheese references. They are two-fold. My adoration of cheese is infinite. Whatever state of molten or solid deliciousness it has taken, I am never far behind. Well, that is partially a lie. I'm on a diet, and cheese, taken in the quantity that I prefer to consume it, is not a positive thing for my waistline. The adoration I have for cheese is only bested by the love I have for my boyfriend, Brian. He lives in Switzerland. Clever, right? :) A shout out to Anna is in order for the creation of the title of my blog, by the way.

I think that suffices for my introduction. My name is Jen, I'm 24 and it's passed my bed time. There, that will be the finishing touch to my first entry. More tomorrow.

Goodnight bloggers.